Linda
 

:)

After seeing it on the web page I must point out that the shading is more subtle than what you see. The pencil work looks too harsh on the screen. I'll see if I can adjust the scan and make it look more like the original.

:)

Jeff,

A few things -

- I absolutely love the idealized way you treat hair. Absolutely love it. This is a very big whup in your drawing and it makes such an impact.

- You really captured a tone and mood. Her intense expression, combined with your precise line work make another strong statement. Compared with your rendering of the features, which I can only describe as "sincere," these two facets make a really striking image. I wish I had another word besides "sincere" but I can't think of one. Maybe it will come to me.

- I wonder if the lid on the far eye should be so light. It seems that it should be more in shadow.

- I also wonder if there should be more tone variation in the skin, just a smidge. The hair is such a mass, I feel like there should be a cast shadow here and there with a similarly dark value to balance it out. Besides the moles. Maybe near the nose, and under her ear, but this may be lacking just from the scan.

Will there be a background?

Love it! Love it!

Thanks a lot, Lisa.

I made a few minor changes. I softened the furrowed brow and changed the shape of her mouth so she doesn't look so squinty. It really helped.

I also worked on my darker values, and sharpened up some of the edges that were too weak.

I'd post the results, but I'm having too much trouble getting a good image with my cheap digital camera. If it's sunny tomorrow, I'll try it again. Sooner or later I'll need to invest in a good camera. I suppose I'll have to start charging for portraits to justify the cost :)

Hi Jeff,

This is a really good effort. I wanted to strongly second Lisa's enthusiasm about the treatment of the hair. It's a real signature style as well.

I'm glad you posted the digital camera shot as it gives a view of the placement on the paper, which looks good.

I'm predicting that this is going to exceed Linda's wildest expectations and result in a bunch of requests from others. You must begin charging for your work. I charge $35 for buddy/co-worker drawings, assuming I can do the job in an hour or less, but you have to sound out whatever the traffic will bear.

Oh yeah, don't forget to sign it! Let us know how it goes.

John

Jeff, you are getting better with every drawing that you post. It's really exciting to see. Are you working with Tony Ryder's book? This drawing has echoes of his technique. (I was wondering if you've tried sketching using his "envelope block-in".)

Hi Jeff,

You might want to soften the shapes around her nose and nasal-labial fold area. The reference probably shows her squinting a lot, and that drastically distorts the shape of the nose and creates a harsh shape outside the nose wing. It was probably like that in the reference, but you might want to consider reducing the contrast and sharpness of those shapes. (As it is, it looks like she has smelled something unpleasant!)

Also, the moles on her cheek seem to be the focal point of the drawing. They are rendered in high contrast against the light on her cheek, with fairly sharp edges. Unless she is particularly proud of these moles you might want to subdue them somewhat.

And, yes, you should definitely start charging for your drawings. Not just a nominal amount either.

I was reading recently that Whistler and Sargent would do free portraits early in their careers only if the subjects sat for them from life. They would do one or two sittings of two or three hours each for a painting, considerably less time for a drawing. That gave the artists great life practice and then the sitter got the painting. Might be worth a try.

I hope you don't mind Photoshop suggestions but I have shown what you might want to do in the areas I mentioned above.

In this example I also straightened the line of her upper lip. When that shape is convex like in your drawing, it contributes to that squint/sneer expression.

There are muscles that lead from the upper edges of the lip up to just outside the nose wings. (I don't remember the name of those muscles, though Peggy Baumgaertner with her medical illustration background could tell us). When someone squints, not only do the eyes change, but those muscles contract. They cause that sneering effect that you see in the widening of the nose wings, the deepening of the upper part of the nasal-labial fold, and the convex shape of the upper lip.

When you change those areas just a little, the expression immediately relaxes and becomes more pleasant, without losing the likeness.

:)

I posted that in a hurry. Now I have time to respond to you.

Linda Brandon,

Yes, I'm using Ryder's techniques. I'm trying to adapt them to my own taste, though. I don't care for the crisp outlines his figures have. It goes against what you SOG folks have taught me about edges.

I'm also incorporating Daniel Greene's technique. It's kind of a hybrid. During the Ryder block-in I use Greene's attention to the "proportions of length".

Michele,

Thanks for the Photoshop work. I had already started some of those changes, based on your description. I think it helped.

John,

I wish I could draw a portrait in an hour or less. Maybe someday.

It's good that you meet friends' requests. $35 is a bargain. The reason I don't want to rush into charging is that I need the practice, and I don't want to discourage people from asking for portraits. I'm not working totally free, though. Linda is buying me a bottle of Kendall Jackson Grand Reserve.

Yes, it's time to give it to her! Brace yourself for a tidal wave of lauds. I like how you defined the jaw too - yesterday when I looked at it again, I though that the lack of cast shadows under the ear/jaw was making it look like the jaw was not attached to the ear, but now I can really see how the form turns.

You should be really proud! It's a lovely drawing.

Jeff this is my favorite so far!

Wow, the hits keep coming. :)

Good job, Jeff. You have inproved so much. Keep it up.

PS. Dont be afraid to do the darkest darks.