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Oh wow, I think I just figured out why I wanted to do this painting so perfectly.
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Funny how that works out sometimes. There's often more than meets the eye to our work, our Forum participation and posts, and our motivation and intentions regarding this whole business. I suspect that much of the time we're not even aware of some of those undercurrents (some of which are riptides).
Sorry to hear about your dad. I lost mine way too soon, a long time ago, and I think I miss him more now than way back then. A pretty creative fellow, he'd have been very pleased that I took up painting. Maybe it was he who "pushed" me in this direction.