|
Dear Michael,
Welcome back! First of all, your contributions to this Forum, have, are now, and will continue to be, most appreciated by the rest of us - fellow travellers on this difficult, frustrating, rewarding, blissful adventure called painting.
As someone who has also suffered from depression I can relate, and I know how debilitating it can be. I think it's great that you are seeking help with it, and it is fantastic that, as you have indicated, you now can separate the depression from the act of painting. The one has nothing to do with the other, though certainly, anything that you are passionate about, that you care deeply about, will be colored by the depression.
In my own case, therapy helped somewhat to get me through the toughest times. But I count myself extremely fortunate in that when (about seven years ago) I allowed myself to draw and paint representationally again (I was an avowed Abstract Expressionist - though a confused one) everything changed. I was able then to move beyond the therapy, because, for me, I had found the ultimate therapy. Here was something I knew I could be very good at, and I poured myself into it. It felt like a "calling" - though I don't pretend to know how that works. And about the same time, I found this Forum and met wonderful fellow artists such as yourself. I haven't looked back.
Every painting I do still goes through some pretty god-awful stages, but I try to remind myself that every failure is an opportunity I should treasure. It's money in the bank. I now see it like - it's all good. It's all a learning experience, and every failure, every success is to be embraced. Even the Great Ones would occassionally paint a real dog. It's always an inextricable part of the process.
I gotta say, it takes a lot of guts to open up the way you have. Bravo!
David
|