Red Boat

[Valerie Gudorf]

Hi,

This is my first attempt at a pencil portrait. It is graphite and colored pencil on Strathmore Artagin paper, light gray with a slight pebble surface. I worked from a photograph which I took. It was a bit of a challenge because the photo was not very good. I lived to regret the use of a paper that was other than white, because I believe it compressed the values more than I would have liked. The boat is rendered in prismacolor pencils. This is a photo of a giclee print. I was not very happy with the way the red sail boat reproduced. There is no temperature variation on the boat in the prints as in the original (which hangs in a dentist office in Baltimore). Live and learn.

Lon, I agree that a photorealistic style has to be 100% accurate, and alas, I don't think I quite made it there.

[Valerie Gudorf]

Sorry, that didn't take---as I said, I'm new at this. Let's try that again...

[Valerie Gudorf]

Here's Detail:

[Valerie Gudorf]

Another:

[Enzie Shahmiri]

Hi Valerie,

I like the piece a lot, especially your use of a bold primary color next to all those grey tones. I wish I could see it up close to see the textures. The red boat seems smoother than the rest, but that might just be my imagination.

I can't find flaws with your drawing skills and think that as a figurative piece the composition is interesting. As a traditional portrait though there are some elements that you should have considered.

1. The focus should be on your subject, rather than on his toy.

2. The stance of the young man and especially the bold red always bring the viewer's eye back to the red boat and away from the boy's face.

3. Althoug the cropping is a clever tool to draw attention to the boat, it does not work well for a portrait.

Welcome to the forum, I will look forward to seeing more of your work.

[Valerie Gudorf]

Thanks Enzie,

You know, I fretted about this piece alot. I worried about that bright red element within an otherwise gray composition. unlike a traditional portrait, I wanted this to be a "mood piece", making it less about the child himself, and more about childhood. The bright red boat was to work as symbolism. Sometimes I think it works, other times not. I agree with your concern about the boat distracting the eyes away from the subject of the drawing. I was hoping that the eyes would go from the face of the boy, to his boat and back. I guess it didn't work. {*sigh*}

You are right in ascertaining that the boat is smooth in texture compared to the rest of the drawing.

[Chris Saper]

Valerie,

First, welcome to the Forum, and thanks for posting your drawing. In addition to Enzie's thoughtful observations, here are some of mine:

Anytime you introduce a saturated note of color into a desaturated context, you create an eye-grabber that becomes your center of interest, whether you want it to or not. There is no stronger example than what you have here in place: a red (so very strong) against grays. Notwithstanding the red, any color note you introduce, even a subtle one, will stand out.

You have in place a lot of excellent directional cues (the glance, the sail, the fingers, boat and returning arm, in a counterclockwise fashion), but they are not enough to stand up to the red.

Given the tone of your paper, you have a wonderful opportunity to wrest control by using highlights in a judicious manner. For your interest, try placing this drawing in a grayscale (Photoshop or other), getting rid of the red, and see what happens when you introduce some lights into the skin tones (not the sail).

Best wishes,

[Steven Sweeney]

Valerie,

Per your request, a few comments on your drawing, which I find engaging and generally well executed. I realize you no longer have access to the piece and that this is somewhat academic.

I actually do like the red-colored sailboat. (I printed out the image in black and white and felt that it

[Valerie Gudorf]

Dear Chris,

Thank you for giving critical consideration to my work. You and Enzi both have confirmed that which I suspected concerning that bright red accent. Would it have worked, had the accent been closer to his face -- a red bandanna tied around the neck, for instance? I was really intrigued by the concept of a unexpected shot of bold color in an otherwise monochrome setting and wanted to give it a try. But I believe I have learned a valuable lesson from this failure.

I have been toying with the idea of doing this same composition in watercolor. I tend to paint watercolors in multiple glazes with careful blending, allowing the paper to completely dry between glazes. I planned to include a background of softly blurred foliage next time, thinking the red/green color complements might work well. The child's skin tone is a warm cinnamon brown and the light on the subject is that of late afternoon. But of course, now I'm not so certain. If I paint the boat a less saturated red, might I avoid the mistake evident in the above drawing?

I do not have Photoshop (or to my knowledge, anything like it), so I can't as yet try the exercise you have suggested, Chris. However, judging from the many threads mentioning such imaging software, I think that I had better acquire it soon. It sounds like an extremely helpful tool.

Chris, two weeks ago I purchased your book,Painting Beautiful Skin Tones, and have since been studying it with keen interest. One of my greatest challenges to date has been ascertaining the relative warmth or coolness of the light source to the shadow areas on the model. But your book offers the clearest explanation of the prinicple that I have read to date. Thank you! Sometime in the future, I would love to take one of your workshops.

[Valerie Gudorf]

Dear Steven,

I can't tell you how much I appreciate your quick response to my request for a critique. All I can say is, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! It is exactly what I was looking for. Your atelier trained eye was able to hone in on this drawing's deficits, which are as numerous as I suspected.

Everything you pointed out are things that had been nudging at the edge of my consciousness; barely audible, but unfortunately not distinguishable voices, saying, "Something's not right here." You are spot on in every instance. The overmodeled shadow running from left armpit to collarbone, and that effect in various other places on the figure, definitely detracts from the the drawing. I believe I fell right into the "over-reliance upon your photographic reference" trap, having not understood that photos often exaggerate values at both ends, shadows in particular. But the effect was further aided by the attempt to compensate for the grey paper's lack of white value. Strangely enough, it did not occur to me to use white conte' or pastel pencil to punch up the high end of the value scale. Duh!

When you pointed out that the overmodeled veinous ridge on the right arm was an eye-catcher, it made so much sense. Indeed, most of my non-artist friends and relatives pointed out that very thing, admiring that I was able to render such detail. Yet another trap laid by ignorant reliance upon my reference. The child, who was eight at the time, definitely did not display such an adult's anatomical trait.

One thing for sure is that faces are impossible to fake. They are either right or they are not. As I suspected in this case, not. That left eye had been bugging me for a long time. I knew something was wrong with it. Everytime I held the image up to the mirror, I could clearly see that it was "off", but I couldn't identify exactly how to fix it. Now, it's as clear as day that the left eye is sunk too deep in the skull, and that the respective disparities in width between the eyes and sides of the head contribute to the sense of "askew". I'd been so busy fretting about the face that I ignored the problem presented by the left ear. Once again, I leaned on the crutch of my photo, which lied to me. Had I known more about anatomy and perspective, I might have avoided this error.

All the modeling and anatomical problems of the hands and fingers which you pointed out, are clear now also. Thank you.

Alas however, there are some sailing terms you mentioned of which I am completely unfamiliar. I haven't a clue as to the meanings of, "leach" and "luff", nor their placement upon the sail's edges. Compounding matters is the fact that I don't know what the "trapezius muscle" is, nor where it is to be found on my model. Suffice it to say, a good anatomy book for artists will be my next art reference purchase. More than likely, his muscles as not as pronounced as they appear in the drawing.

As to the little boat itself, unfortunately it has no rudder. Of that I am sure because, besides the terms, sail and deck, rudder is the only other sailing definition of which I have confident knowledge. The end of that limited knowledge butts right up to the term, transom. What's a transom?

Steven, your critique has done me an invaluable favour. As I read it at about 3:00 this morning, I kept thinking, "Yes, so that's what I've been doing wrong!" It's like a list of things to avoid repeating in the future, broadening my understanding of sound artistic principles. Now, I'm more determined than ever to banish these weaknesses.

I only wish I had access to an atelier style art academy. It must be something akin to "boot camp" for artists, so exacting are the standards for excellence. But that's exactly what I desire. Having dedicated years studying at the Bougie School, you must have realized tremendous growth in every aspect of your art. I envy you, but more so, I admire your generosity. No one offers a more carefully considered and accurate critique than you do, passing on insights and understanding which you yourself received. Your assessment of my drawing energized and inspired me to aim for greater artistic proficiency. I believe I have the sensibilites of an artist. Now I need to hone my skills in order to best express them.