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I developed my photo session techniques in a vacuum so I may be breaking all the rules, but this is what works for me. When I am shooting a subject, anyone who wants to be present is welcome. I have found that I often get a more relaxed and genuine look if the subject has a loved one there to elicit spontaneous smiles and gestures. Especially with children, I can sometimes get a much better expression when grandmom or mom is holding them. And I can use that face with the body from another photo to achieve the look we're after. The painting on my children's page of two little children on a beach, sitting on a towel with a pail of water, was created that way. I used the pose from the beach, the boy's face from a photo taken in the grandmother's yard, and the girl's face from a photo taken while grandmom was holding her. And I did another portrait awhile ago for which the only way I could get the kind of cheerful, relaxed expression we were after was to have the grandmother tickle the child.
I also make sure to have props for children; in the first case I actually brought along a small rocking horse so that I had a way to keep the little girl relatively quiet and in one place for the camera, and shot the boy's face while he was on his scooter. A high chair for a young child works well if you can pull it off; children are usually accustomed to being immobile in that setting and don't become as restless.
Even when working with adults, I enjoy having spouses or significant others present. They are often excellent at suggesting typical poses or gestures and help make the experience more comfortable for the subject. I can also get less self-conscious facial expressions when they're interacting with a loved one or friend.
And by contrast, in my previous incarnation as a psychologist I would never allow parents or relatives to be present during evaluation procedures - unless it were a very young child who needed restraint or reassurance, and then I set up quite strict parameters.
The two situations seem to call for very different treatments, to me.
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